By Bianca Monaco
It was June and the handsome man sitting with his friends looked at me twice. Not just once, but twice. There was no mistaking it. I quickly scribbled on the back of a receipt “Just in case you were wondering”signed with my number and put it in my pocket. Twenty-minutes later he was leaving the bar with his friends. I took a swig of my drink, got up from my seat and followed them out of the bar. I caught him at the door, put my hand out and said “Sorry I never got your name, I’m Bianca.” He smiled took my hand pulled me in for a cheek kiss and introduced himself as Alfie. His smile widened as his hand pulled away and tucked the note in his pocket. I turned my head to leave and told him to have a good night. Two days into June and I was already scouting for a summer fling. You know, the lovely no strings kind of summer plans. They expire on labor day but the stories accumulated over the summer keep you warm on winter nights and in some exceptions they manifest into a little something more.
Let’s keep things in perspective: The glorious thing about a fling is that it’s light, it’s easy, it’s fun and you can have multiple of them. Smile at the lifeguard by day and banter with the bartender by night. With that, here are a few tips to keep in mind:
Nothing is personal, no response to a phone call or text? It’s insignificant because you are already out grabbing drinks with friends.
Carpe Diem is a state of mind. The only future plan your making is something that is within the next 24 hours. We’re not talking about road trips or visiting each other outside of the summer season.
This isn’t Grease. Mind you the only reason why Sandy and Danny got together was because they randomly ended up at the same school. When it was all said it done, they left their summer with smiles and tales of summer nights. You’re not leaving a fling mad that it didn’t turn into something more, you’re leaving them with a smile and a story.
When in doubt be bold. If you are texting a fling and see a potential player to add to your roster, go for it. Write your number down, make the introduction: be foolish. The only person you’re cheating is yourself for not making the most of the summer season.
If you do find yourself building a roster and don’t know how to handle multiple practices, you need to prioritize and be mindful of time. Be kind, be real, be honest. There is no need to tell lies about meeting them at a bar and then not showing up, that is not in the contract. If you can’t make it to that bar or occasion because you’re else where, say you can’t make it but hope you can meet up another time. Don’t mess with people’s time, the summer only lasts so long for all of us, and you don’t need that kind of karma.
Although some of you might not be building the roster, you might be investing in one Star Player. A large amount of investment can sometimes leave us wondering if the fling will last longer than the season for white clothes. Some tell tale signs that it’s safe wonder…you hang out with their friends enough that your absence will be noticed, your conversations start sinking deeper than frivolous flirting, and lastly without even noticing it you’ve made a future plan outside of the summer season. That’s when you’ve crossed over to the relationship territory.
However, before we get ahead of ourselves, let’s be honest- It’s the summer- the season that demands foolish gestures of stolen glances, late night escapades, and running out of a bar to slip a handsome man your number. Tis’ the season to have a fling and knowing this after my swanky walk away I was treated to a promising text: “I was wondering the whole time, nice to meet you.” Let the stories begin.